


Tact, and Other Useless Things

by SymphonySoldier97



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, Inappropriate Dinner Conversation, M/M, clueless!Cas, embarrassed!Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-05
Updated: 2015-07-05
Packaged: 2018-04-07 18:22:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4273350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SymphonySoldier97/pseuds/SymphonySoldier97
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No one would challenge Castiel’s ability to get a job done. No one would dare suggest that he would not do it as ethically as possible. No one can deny, Castiel has many talents- many wonderful qualities. </p><p>However, no one would ever make the mistake of assuming Castiel was tactful.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tact, and Other Useless Things

**Author's Note:**

> Remember when I said I don't write Sastiel? 
> 
> Oops.

Castiel is generally considered among his brothers and sisters to be the most personable angel in the garrison. Sure, maybe he doesn’t know a lot of human slang, but almost every angel would agree that Castiel has a big heart and truly cares about those around him. Some would even say he cares too much. 

Castiel is also loved. He is usually regarded as a “younger brother” even though that is completely illogical seeing as how God created them all at the same time- as Cas liked to remind his brothers. He is teased, of course, but he is definitely loved. 

No one would challenge Castiel’s ability to get a job done. No one would dare suggest that he would not do it as ethically as possible. No one can deny, Castiel has many talents- many wonderful qualities. 

However, no one would ever make the mistake of assuming Castiel was tactful. 

“Sam, I wish to see you naked.” 

Sam chokes on his coffee so violently that it ends up spewed across the dinner table and right into Castiel’s face. “Cas, what the fuck?”

“Was that wrong? Should I have been more specific?” He wipes his face off with the edge of his coat, undeterred. “I very much desire to see your penis, Sam.” 

Sam is sure that he has never in his life blushed so incredibly red. “Cas! Shut up!” 

He can’t even chance a look at his brother, but he’s positive that Dean is turning a very interesting shade of green right now. Cas, however, doesn’t seem to be having any such problem. He leans toward Dean and barely lowers his voice at all to ask. “Should I have said ‘cock’ instead? Humans seem to be very particular about their terms for the phallus.” 

Cas is eager to hear what Dean has to say- Dean is very knowledgable about such things- but he is suddenly being bodily hauled backwards by the collar of his shirt. Which is highly embarrassing. He is an Angel of the Lord, after all. However, Dean had told him yesterday when he asked that if he truly wishes to see Sam naked, he must be very accommodating. So, he lets a mortified Sam drag him into the nearest bedroom. 

Only good things could come of Sam taking him to a bedroom. Sex usually happens in bedrooms, right? Cas would very much like to have sex with Sam. 

But Sam doesn’t look very aroused. Perhaps Cas has done something wrong. 

“Cas, seriously, what the actual fuck, man?!” 

Cas squints up at him. “I don’t understand. Why are you upset?” 

Sam lets out an exasperated huff, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Look, you can’t just say shit like that at the dinner table!” 

Cas nods in understanding. “I see. I should have said ‘cock’ instead of ‘penis’.” 

A garbled, unintelligible sound of disbelief escapes Sam. “NO! I mean, please never say the word ‘penis’ again, but that is not what I meant! You can’t just start talking about sex whenever you feel like it! Especially sex with me! Especially in front of Dean!” 

“Oh. Do you believe he will feel left out?” 

Sam is ready to melt into a puddle or disintegrate into thin air or be anywhere but this situation. Why? What has he done to deserve this humiliation? Sure, he kind of would like to experiment a little with Cas, but not at the motherfucking dinner table. And NOT with Dean sitting right the fuck there. 

“Listen, Cas, this is a conversation we need to have alone, okay? I’m not…” Sam’s blush deepens. “I kind of want that, too, but man, c’mon, we gotta have some ground rules first.” 

Cas has heard Dean talk about rules before. He says they’re sexy, which makes no sense to Cas, but if Sam finds rules arousing then he supposes he can try to see the appeal. “Okay.” He acquiesces. “But Sam?” 

“What is it, Cas?” 

“May I kiss you first, please?” 

Sam wants to be annoyed. He really, really does. Cas just embarrassed the ever loving fuck out of him and damn, he is never going to live this down with Dean, and the man he wants to make his boyfriend is just so clueless-

When he presses his lips to his favorite angel’s, his train of thought slams to a screeching halt, and he almost forgets the past ten minutes. Almost. 

“Sam?” Cas asks as they pull away. “Am I allowed to say “phallus”?” 

Sam sighs. They have a lot of work to do.


End file.
